Bila Cinta

One of the greatest Malay song :'(
I miss you.

Why?

Life hasn't been the same for me this past few days.
I've got no one to talk to at night.
No wake up calls to make.
No one to text whenever I'm going somewhere.
I miss doing all that.
I really do :'(

I know

I don't know, a smile you won't be seeing for a while.
I'm really sorry :'(

Cold

I wasn’t perfect
I’ve done a lot of stupid things
Still no angel
I wasn’t looking for forgiveness
Wasn’t laid out by my pride
Shocked by his attention
And someone signed me up for love
Now I can’t live without it
He changed my life
He cleaned me up
He found my heart
Yes, he can
He pulls me up
When he knows I’m sad
Yes, he can
He’s kind of perfect
He’s kind of everything I’m not
It’s amazing how he’s patient
Even more at times I’m not
He’s my conscience
And now I can’t live without him

Wishes

It's been only three days.
Mommy Jan dropped by my house this morning.
She said I look sick and pail.
Well, umi thinks the same way too.
Life hasn't been really smooth for me.
It's really hard.
I know that crying won't solve anything but I just can't seem to stop.
I don't really eat, I've got no appetite.
I wish I can change things but I'm nobody to do that.
I can only pray for better things to happen.
Ya Allah, I'm scared :'(

Bad Dream

I've been having sleepless nights.
But two nights ago, I fell asleep, it was quite early at that time.
I had a dream, the scariest dream I say.
I dreamed of snakes.
I asked my mum about it.
According to her, there are two meanings of dreams of snake.
1. Someone is coming to meminang you or something.
2. Syaitan.

From what she concluded, knowing that I'm only 17, it doesn't make sense that the meaning of my dream is the first one.
It may be syaitan.
She said I shouldn't be stop praying to God so that I'll be protected from unwanted incidents.
So Dear God, do protect me.
Amin

Words of Hopes

I'm gonna take a break from Twitter for a while.
Let me recover from the pain I've done to myself for couple of days before I get back to Twitter.

I wanna get back to the old me,
The one who doesn't get mad easily.
The one who's never rude to people.
The one who loves her boyfriend very much.
The one who smiles all the time.
The one who never gives up.
The one who believes in herself.
The one who eats up her meals.
The one who's not good with bad words.
The one who doesn't get jealous without reasons.
The one who can be trusted.
The one who studies really hard.
The one who cries a lot because she has a heart.
Not the one who cries without a heart.

Dear God, help me in finding my way back to this girl cause I can't hurt people anymore including myself.

Prayers

Ya Allah, thank you for answering one of my prayers.
Thanks for still listening to me, even after how rude I have been to people.
Nik has explained her part, I have explained mine and Alhamdulillah things are okay between us.
Things are finally cleared between us.
I'm thanking you, God for giving me another chance.
I will never stopped seeking for your forgiveness, boy.
Dear Allah, do help me.
Open up his heart.
Amin.

Not Everyone

Not everyone will go through what you're going through.
Not everyone feels how you've been feeling.
Not everyone understands everything that you've been try to explain.
Not everyone will be there for you even after you were always there for them.
Not everyone accepts how sorry you are even when you've apologized with all your heart.
Not everyone is going to help you when you're stuck in the biggest obstacle of life.
Not everyone is going be your friend when you really need someone to talk to.
Not everyone can change you inside out.
Not everyone can make you smile.
Not everyone can make you laugh.
Not everyone can make you cry.
But God can do all that.

Ya Allah, I am really sorry for all the sins I've done this past few weeks.
I hurt people's feelings.
I hurt my own feelings.
I said and felt things that I shouldn't.
I wrote words that I shouldn't be writing.
I'm really sorry, Dear God.
Cause You're Al-Ghafur, The Forgiver and Hider of Faults.

Light

Love is beautiful, it's simple to say but the meaning is different to me.

It is beautiful when you found someone who can really change you.

When I said change, what I meant was from someone not-so-nice-person to a better person.

Love is beautiful when you have that someone who is always there for you.

It is amazingly wonderful when you have that someone who's always reminds you of being a good muslim.

Love is gorgeous when you have that one person who you always share secrets with.

Love is described as beautiful when you have that one person who has never stopped from helping you when you need help.

If you ask me to define love, I don't think I can do so but I can show you how beautiful love works.

So Anas, I'm so glad I have you.

I thank God for having you.

I'm so grateful to know you.

You should know that no matter what happen,

you will always be the guy who has won my heart and my mind :)

I love you now and always.

BB

Yes,  my new baby.

A BIG THANK YOU TO my one and only Anas :)

I love you.